early valentines

my new definition of a #mikadoafternoon would now be paul on his oversized grandfather's chair, sipping tea and reading essays and aphorisms by shopenhauer, with me on the harp, learning the thornbirds theme - all these after ice cream, an overflowing amount of hugs and kisses, and a long siesta on the couch..in winter. and that warm feeling you get after paul whispers okay, now i'm officially in love with you ^^

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chandeleur

classy, mr. tiebot..very classy <3

crepes. savory. sweet. candles. sparkling wine. wine glasses. roses. lille waffles. vinyl. the beatles. the platters. chopin. beethoven. tea. hugs. kisses. couch cuddles <3. 020216.

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roses

prayer is impressive. saying that prayer during the adoration is more impressive owing to the fact that God seems to answer them right afterwards. the first time i "bargained" with God, i am not extremely proud of this, was during that time i couldn't finalize my schedule because of the trouble with the internship contract. it stressed me out so much i told God i would commit to the international choir if he would fix things for me because i have already done everything i can. right afterwards He "cornered" me into committing to the choir practice and the following day He fixed everything and i was finally able to finalize my schedule. i have committed myself to the choir ever since and i do try my best to be faithful to the commitment. the awesome thing is, on days when i seem to slack out, paul unknowingly drags me back on the right trail.

this is where paul comes into today's story. 

for all intents and purposes, i believe it's safe to say paul likes me to some extent. during tonight's coffee date he gave me three roses, so yes he DOES like me. do i like paul? well, he is amazing. i tried not to check him against my checklist just yet but i couldn't help but peek earlier today and he actually checks out! i have been praying for a lot of other things before - my courses, my exams, my family, etc - and, after all he has done for me the past few weeks, i guess it's just high time i really have to pray for both of us.

so i did.

tonight i prayed for positive results on my phd applications. i also asked God to guide us both, to let our love grow with his blessing or to remove these feelings if it is not right. this amazing thing happened after the adoration, while we were all socializing with each other, a woman came up to us and asked, 

"are those the first flowers he has given you?"

"yes, it actually is.."

"ahh, the holy spirit must be with him"

i was not quite sure how to react to that but, somehow, i feel like God is trying to tell me something. all the same, i do pray that God will continue to guide this relationship. i trust God knows best.

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bye 2015

2015 is a year i never hope to live again, and the most accurate way to describe it is that 2015 is a lesson in failure. failure is an annoying phenomenon. you think you've chosen your battles wisely enough and then one bright, sunny afternoon it just gracelessly sweeps you off your feet and slams you hard, face down on the ground, and before you can even grieve you have to find your feet and redo your life plan in a jiffy. it's not a particularly easy thing to do especially if one is carelessly confident and does not have a back-up plan for failure. i can only be grateful to the people who has allowed me time to bawl my heart out when the rest of the world expected me to be strong and smile and move on.

but to end the year on a good note, the odd years have generally worked in my favor before and despite everything, 2015 was still jam-packed with good experiences: the thesis, working in the clean room, presenting at an IYL forum, working on SOI technology, corresponding with (THE one and only) imec, meeting people professionally, spending an afternoon at the bell labs, seeing my sister twice, seeing the pope, travelling to four different countries, joining the choir, being waltzed properly, and learning the harp..and also being told i'd make a good wife (obviously by somebody oblivious of the fact that i hate cooking bwahahaha).

and so, in spite of it all, it was still a good year and i would like to thank again everyone who made it to the acknowledgement page of my master's thesis, my professors, old friends who have kept in touch, new friends who have been very welcoming, and the lady from the lego store who secretly gave me a c3po despite my total purchase not reaching 30eu haha. but, seriously, thank you. i have never been so eager to get out of a year as i am for this one and i hope 2016 brings better experiences to us all.

happy new year :)

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#happykindofdizzy

every girl should have the chance to be waltzed properly at least once in her life ^^

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